Few Liners For Fun -1

It's not the one which I felt like writing some crap as usual and sat down and wrote. It's just my attempt to recall my some of the best incidents I have come across and scrub them here absolutely for fun.
Though names have been changed, most of them have happened with me :)

It was Mr.Blinton on brigade road who stunned with amazing technology Indians use to park there cars right in middle of the road, which is both side covered with environment friendly green sheets.
He asked his driver "which company has executed this project"?.
Immediately driver said "Sir it is not company, its Kumarswamy's metro project and that is not parking lot.
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The federal government's Department of Transportation's cheif was on vacation in Bangalore, When he saw green signal started blinking at trinity circle, he got confused.
He asked the auto driver "I have never seen blinking green.. what does it stand for in traffic rules"?
Driver said "Sir Bhat it sayssss iss, if you guts you go" means "Power iddare Hogu anta saar" Aste.

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One day teacher asked in B'lore school "why do rest of the western countries feel Indians are adventurous?"
The boy in the last row uttered.. Because we cross the road from anywhere and everywhere :)
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Genius software engineer was returning to his native on Friday evening without reserving the bus ticket.
In the bus stop he searched his pocket to find something, that can be thrown from the window to confirm a seat for him.
When he got into the bus neither the seat was free nor his valet was there.
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A Domain Called GHOST

Mr. Gill Bates dead and due to the bugs he left in Bindows and the Bindows usres all over the world cursed his soul not to find rest. His soul was wondering in the IT world of ghosts, where they have only linux installed on everyones palmtop and notebooks. Not every soul is lucky enogh to get into such a secured domain.However Gill's soul made it.When Mr. Gill's soul got assigned an IPV6 address as a part of the first formality completion to be a a part of GHOST IT domain. As soon as Mr.Gill found IP address for himself, he attended New Souls Orientation(NSO) program. He was given "Senior software Soul" offer letter from the HOD of the Advanced Routing Technology business unit. When NSO started, he was hoping that at least someone will call him on the stage to address, But he ended up only in listening to them. He was the last one to go out the room as other souls left the program and attended the program remotely through telepresence or IPTV. He was stunned to see the development there.

When NSO got over, he asked for his cube, all the souls started laughing at him. IT support head soul explained him that wireless is enabled everywhere, and near lake and golf grounds there will be Wi-Fi connectivity too and also Wi-Max is expected to be in operation by this afternoon, Sonone requires a particular cube here.

Mr. Gill become speechless and started wondering if all these were there for My-Soft-Crew....... It was then he remembered his notebook had only linux installed and his is very dumb in it. Immediately he opened a case with IT support team requesting them install Bindows Pista on his notebook. Within fractions of seconds he got the reply like the following.
Dear Sir,

It is not like Your-Soft-Crew company, which takes minimum 48 hours to address the simple problem and give bullshit resolution to it, That is why you are reading this message so soon. We are proud to say that we do not support dual boot and even if we plan to do it the future defenitely it wont be any of the Bindows flavors like pista, badam, karjur etc in addition with linux.

Please note that you will be trained on linux with some fresher souls from tomorrow morning. If this does not answer your question please be feel to contact us on
3ffe:501:8:0:260:97ff:fe40:efab OR 3ffe:1900:4545:3:200:f8ff:fe21:67cf.

With Love,
IT support Team
GHOST Domain.

Mr.Gill Bates was in deep shit by now. Before he could finish this letter, there was one more message waiting to be read in his inbox. Stressed Gill somehow managed to open the mail and fainted. After knowing his poor knowledge in linux, Ghost domain soul CEO degraded him from Senior Software Soul to Software Soul Trainee.

ಸರ್ವಿಸ್ ಕಂಪನಿ ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಕೆಲಸಾ ಬಿಟ್ಟು

It was last sunday I listened to the beautiful track "Gubbachhi Goodinalli" from Bindaas ..
I dont know why, I liked it very much and was murmring the same song for two to three days ..
When I use to forget the lyrics, I use to make my own sentences there just to follow the tune,.. Trust me the following remix is the result of my bad memory :)


ಸರ್ವಿಸ್ ಕಂಪನಿ ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಕೆಲಸಾ ಬಿಟ್ಟು
-----------------------------------------
Service company alli kelasa bitti
Iddiddu onsite Gella MooTe Katti
Inta nooru options yaaru tandoru ee IT ge Ye ye ..

Service company alli kelasa bitti Kelasa bitti !!

Bere company calluuu
Offerina Jotegeeee
Nodida aa kshanaa
Shuruvayithu ramayana aa

Bidisittu offer mundeee
Nodida aa galigeee
Yochane madade
Paper na hakideee ...

IT vondu, sambala sindu
Ellarigu Endendigu ye ye

Service company alli kelasa bitti
Iddiddu onsite gella moote katti
Inta nooru options yaaru tandoruu ee IT ge Ye ye ..

Nanna CV mele
Hosa company hesaru
Ellaruu Andaru
Settlu nivibbaru

Noraru problem listu
Nanagagiye kottaru
Madalu aagadu
IT ye antadu ....

IT seri sambala dari
Hideve endidigu .. ye ye

Service company alli kelasa bitti
Iddiddu onsite gella moote katti
Inta nooru aashe yaaru tandoru ee IT ge Ye ye ..

Home Loan Demystified

The age of desiring to own a house is rapidly coming down now a days. For our previous generation making a house of their dream was their life time compilation.They bough their house when they were close to retirement.The young generation would like to own a house before they cross their thirties. This mentality is the results of high earning capability and bank loan availability. Even though most of us know, bank loan for house is the one way to dream a dream house and save large amount of tax, many are still in confusion with certain things. I have tried my best to clear it. I owe thanks to Times Property.

To make this mystery a little clear, let me divide this into two sections.
i) Home loan fundamentals
ii) Tax Benefits over it.

Home Loan Fundamentals

The first basic we need to know is we own a home, while still repaying the loan. This is the kind of the loan, which is as good as investment, which lets you own an asset that has multiplied manifolds in its value. You end up paying manifolds return in the form of interest for the amount you bough the loan. But at least it's works out as savings at the end, which wouldn’t have been possible if you were tried to accumulate it.

Now coming to the point banks gives the loan for constructing a new home or buying already constructed home/flat or residential plots. Even banks re-finance the existing home loans. The amount that one can avail depends upon their salary, age, educational qualifications, history of any loan availed before from the same bank or other banks. One can club his earning with any of the family member (spouse, father, mother, brother) to avail more loan. Typically bank lends the money for which EMI outflow is 30 to 50 percent of your salary. I feel personally to make EMI's which works out to be 40% of the take home salary to avoid the burden at any point of time.

Now question arises is what this EMI at all ?? Well, EMI stands for Equated Monthly Installment. EMI is sum of the principal and interest amount that borrower pays towards the bank on monthly basis for the amount he has barrowed from the bank. EMI repayments commence when u take a full disbursement of the loan amount. Pending final amount disbursement, barrowers only pay interest on the amount disbursed. This is called pre-EMI. During initial years of the repayment barrower ends up paying huge interest amount and less principal. As the years goes by the case will get reversed.

Now coming to types of interest rates, banks offer three flavors of interest rates floating, fixed and hybrid. In case of floating rates interest rates fluctuates with the pre-vailing market rates. Barrowers who offer the floating rate should make their mind ready to pay more if market goes up and enjoy the low interest rate if its goes down. On the other hand fixed rate remains same for the entire tenure of the loan, But very less banks offers this. Most of the banks offers you the fixed rate only for short tenure. Meaning, let us say bank offers fixed interest rate for 5 years. They reset the interest rate after 5 years. Along with these two the third flavor is more flexible even though less popular. In case of hybrid rates, bank gives you options to lock certain amount for fixed rate and lock the remaining for floating rate. Usually good to opt for this, locking 50% for floating and remaining 50% for fixed. :)

Even though there are many EMI calculators available on the net. I am just letting u know, using what formula it is calculated.

EMI = (L*I) * {(1+I)^N/((1+I)^N-1)}

Where, L = Loan Amount
I = Interest rate (rate per anum divided by 12)
^ = to the power of
N = Loan period in months

You can also use online calculator from here. http://www.hdfc.com/calculator/emical.asp

Tax Benefits over it

This is the most interesting and confusing part of the home loan. To state in a simple sentence barrower can avail tax benefits on both principal and interest components. The repayment made on the principal amount from the barrower can be claimed under section 80C. The maximum amount that can be claimed under this section is Rs 1 lakh. Apart from the principal amount repaid this limit includes provident fund from the employee side, public PF, LIC premium, equity linked saving schemes of MFs investments, infrastructure bonds, pension plans etc. The repayment made on the interest component can avail the tax benefits under section 24. The maximum limit here is 1.5 lacks. There are no other components under this section as there were few for 80C. However this limit of 1.5 lacks is only for self occupied property.

So let us take an example to understand this better. Assume Gundapi total taxable income is 5 lacks. he can claim 1.5 lacks under section 24, which is the interest component of the laon for a year. Thus leaving 3.5 lacks as taxable income now. Assuming his contribution for PF from his salary is 50K, and his LIC premium per year is 25K, concluding both he can claim for 75K under section 80C. Now he can claim only 25K under section 80C as the repayment made for principal amount, even though he has made more than 25K as repayment towards principal.

The first house with tax benefits from under section 80C and under section 24 is viewed as the self occupied property. One can avail tax benefits on both the principal amount as well as interest amount on this. However if you invest in second house, it is not treated as the first one for tax benefits. The second property is treated as it is rented out. So homeowners can not claim the principal amount for tax benefits under section 80C. However there is no upper limit for claiming for the tax benefits under 24C. Meaning for second property one can claim the full amount which is repaid to the bank as the interest component.

For example, If one already owns a home(self occupied) for which he has home loan and availing tax benefits of 25K under section 80C and 1.5lakh under section 24.
If he wish to go for second property with home loan, he can still avail tax benefits over it too. Assuming he pays 2 lacks as principal amount, and 2.5 lacks interest in a year. For that year he can not claim any amount under section 80C. However he can avail tax benefits on complete 2.5laks under section 24.

Probably this information did not increase the confusion :) .. Still there are things to be written about the tax implications over the property, and POA.

Tax implications meaning What if I sell out my property after 2 years or after 5 years ?? etc. I will discuss about it in my next blog.

Anyway Bangalore is growing like anything in all the directions. Currently not many developments are seen on Bangalore west. However Master plan 2015 is been designed to develop IT sector along mysore road. So even though many says real estate prices are going down, this applies to the areas where there are excess. Even though rates have gone down, they are still not yet reachable to common man. However I feel this is the correct time to buy a property in Bangalore.

Happy Tax savings :)

Munnar+Tekkadi+Shenga Group = ?

"Three feet above the heaven" is the substitution I can find as the placeholder for the question mark in the title. What else would have given me such a great pleasure??? It's the awesome trip I had from 21st dec to 25th dec of 2007. Probably its the best trip I ve ever had with our boys. But sadly everytime I go for trip with shenga boys, and at the end I feel "it was the best among all". Every trip we had gone so far had been best in its own way. But this one was king of all :)

Well, the discussion and planning started for the trip a month ago. To reach the conclusion we flooded google servers and Kiri made servers completely busy by exploring the map, posting the docs, gathering the contacts etc etc . And also we gave birth to shengatrip group on google groups :).

It was 11:15 on Friday night, we clicked the first photo and boarded the vehicle. A band of 9 shengas positioned themselves and new brand new shengas got added at first block Rajajinagar making a total of "shenga Eleven". We started celebrating the trip with beer cans even before we crossed blore. Borgal's awesome dailouges, Karna's and Giri's laugh and in between S.A.P SAP labs suri's dailouges made the journey remarkable.

Before we realized that sun has made his appearance, we were in Tamilnadu and finished all our morning duties in doorless/lockelss bath rooms :) ....Come on!! we are not that bad ... Water was there..... :) It was perfect saturday feeling for all of us as we were getting ready for breakfast at 11 in the morning ....... Oh No! Thinking how can it be morning?? ....:). To be frank it's my early morning on saturday. Well we repleted our stomach in gujju owned A1-plaza in tamilnadu with masala and rava dosas.

We were in the piece of the land of the"Gods own Country" called "Tekkadi" by 3. It would be injustice if I do not say anything about the kerala roads. The best roads I ve seen so far in the "ghat" sections. The amazing roads took us to worlds nature's envy place tekkadi, where we went for criuse boating for an hour. The words fall short if I try to explain the beauty of the nature we enjoyed. I have only seen such a nature in windows screen savers ... I was amazed by the way birds have managed to cuddle in the dried out trees right in the middle of the river. I felt, may be this is the "nature at it's best and nature at the nests" .. But later only I realised that god's own country glorifies the nature in every inch of it's land. None of us realised how those 60 to 70 minutes passed...When we came out of the boat, every ones eyes and faces were gratified.

With those joy filled feeling, we headed to munnar, the place which is known as "World's ENVY". Munnar deserves to be world's envy. The moment munnar region starts we get see "Tea Estates" on either sides of the road. The gazing towards it in the bright moon light will gets you an illusion of drawing of squared green boxes lined up in rows and columns. Somehow girya missed to experience those wonderful things at night. :) He was snoring like a pig in the last seat of a bus :)

Sunday morning we headed for speed boating towards "muttupetty dam" located at 10 km from munnar, Since our bad luck was good, we did not find the tickets. Without wasting much of our time we maneuvered ourselves to "KUNDALE LAKE" where we went for "peddle Boating". 11 guys, 4 boats lined up all the boats in the middle of the river and challenged for race. Since we had 'Borgal' with us we won the race :) .. It was truely awesome to be the middle of the river with your best pals and you are totally detached from the software world. All of us uttered in a loud voice "yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" and some crap.

We made circle out of the four boats and clicked some snaps .. I braked right by 45 degrees and headed towards home(shore).. By the time all reached shore, I already had two pineapples. All together we managed to eat around 7 pineapples :) .. We headed towards the place called "TOP
STATION" which is peak of the munnar. We were astonished to see the clouds passing by at hand stretch distance. Here we really had the fun as well as clicked enough photos in various angels. Karna started video recording and everyone introduced themselves with the favourite step of their dance. Most of them ended up with "annamma" dance step .. But those moments can be cherished till the last breath. With no mood to return we asked sun to set so that we can return back home and he calmly listened to all of us and started making his appearance to the other side of the world and we started climbing the hill .. . By the time we reached top all were sweating even though it was chill like ice outside.

We boarded on the bus after having a hot tea and headed towards cottage again. On the way we planned to sing some beautiful kannada songs ..But Borgal and Girya made sure that nobody sings the songs ... When anyone use to start singing they use to start "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" in the background in the melodies( they think :) ) voice .. But singer used to stop .. We reached cottage and had our dinner and started playing cards... and myself n Santya were invloved in spanish league match between Real madrid and Barcelona . .. My favourite Barcelona lost the match and with the sad feeling I surrendered myself for sleep..

It was Monday morning, I woke up when tea came to room :) ... We headed towards "Lokkam Falls". We reached there at around 12 in the noon .. We actually did not go there to see the water falls .. Because munnar is such a place u find amazing water fall at every 200 mts of distance ... All falls gives the impression that as if someone trying to help to the forest to take bath in the milk... it's one such unique abstraction I found in munnar. Well If I start explaining abt that pages feel short for me .. One should experience it .. Well we resisted ourselves a lot to not to get into ice-chilled water .. But all went in vain .. We got into water and enjoyed a lot there.

Time was clicking and headed to munnar back as many of us were pretty much interested to see how nature freak munnar city looks likes .. On the way back our home we took a pit stop near one more water falls to have our lunch .. This was the best lunch we had ever in any of the trips ... We had Jowar rottis with NK special chatni powder and curd ...

Guys roamed around the city for 2 hours and enjoyed the beauty of city as well as beauty of kuttis :) ... It was 7:30 when all of us headed towards "Hydel Park" for Camp-Fire. It was nicely arranged with music exclusively for the great shenga group.. We started dancing around the fire .. Borya's nagina step, suri's continuous dance, Hari's awesome break dance, karna's shoulder dance, Kanti's/girya's jump over the fire, girish's train idea ... made the night most memorable...

When all got tired .. opened our beer cans and started sipping it .. Trust me ..Nothing else can be compared to the pleasure of this ....

Next day morning started towards blore and reached with painful feeling of going to office next day :( ..

But last but not the least I feel I have seen "Little Europe in spring" at "Munnar in Winter".

Nanna Rachane (old one)

This is my composition when I was in Korea. It was difficult time of the projects, where I use to see * (stars/pointers) even in the dreams. I was inspired by the song " Car Car car car eldoni car" from Nagathihalli Chandrashekar's movie "America America".

code code code code elnodi code
code code code code elnodi code

Female: editor open madikondu
testing antha helikondu
product antha ready madtharoo

Male : nammaralli hangenilla
service company open madi
freshers ella recriut madthare ..

Female: ero kelasa outsource madi
mail chatu madikondu
online alle preethi madtharo

Male : Nammuralli hangenilla
net ge access irodilla
ip nalli timepass madtharoo

Female : code code code elnodi code
code de karbaru .. code de darbaru
comp tumba bariya codegalooo

Male : nammuralli enanthare gottha

kuthukondu baredadre mugiyodilla
astu time nannalilla
free code naa download madthare

Female: editor open madikondu
testing antha helikondu
product antha ready madtharoo

Male : nammaralli hangenilla
service company open madi
freshers nella recriut madthare ..

code code code code elnodi code

Female : codige hodedhata codige badidhata
codige illi jagala kanirooo

Male : namma deshadalli anu anthre gothha

bus alli hodre late agutte
bike alli hodre duragutte
leave haki maneyalli kurthare
Movie givi nodikondu
M.G. road alli suthhikondu
hayagi hoogi kudidu malagathare

Female : code code code elnodi code
code code code elnodi code
code illi life kaniroooo

Male: codi gintha company mukya
company gintha sambala mukya
anno neethi namma Uralli
code code code code elnodi code

The Heart Broken

It is not my fiction story. It's a true incident.
My roomie is falling down in my arms as if he does not have any tiny power in his body. As soon as he fell in my arms, He started breathing heavily. His eyes turned red like a hot iron. His complete body is sweating. He was trying to speak so many things, but with a dead voice. He was trying to convey so many things, all in vain. He was just able to stammer some of words. The worst of all was he was pretty fine just last night when we had a dinner together. Can it be cardiac attack?? I asked myself at the first point when he was trying to sleep in my lap. Later though at 26?? I felt no chance ...

Then the mighty question I had was "What can bring him down to the earth in less than 12 hours?? " What can make him so flighty like a horse .. The question
remained unanswered until he was out of place called "hospital" .. I dont know we should rename this as Medical Business Centre .. Now a days name HOSPITAL
does not suit it much. Anyways its not the topic.

It was 11 o clock when we took our roomie to the hospital, doctor verified him and as usual asked him to undergo ECG. ECG was varying thats what was informed to we guys when we were sitting in visitors room .. After some time doc said T3 level is down .. We all nodded our brainless heads as if we understood everything. But we still didn't know the reason why all this happened to him. We all felt as if watching some one man show movie without a story.

He gained his sense back at around 12 and still was speechless But we noticed that pillow was wet due to his tears. He was trying to gain all his courage and speak to us But all was going in vain as his eyes used to shedder tears as soon as he looks into our eyes. None of us worried much about the "WHY" at that time. We were pretty happy that nothing things were under little control. After struggling for about half an hour he was able to tell only one thing.. He said "HE WAS HEART BROKEN"..

"BULL SHIT" I uttered first. Good that it did not reach his ears. He started his story around 2 and we asked him to put pull stop to the story at 4.. But noticable action was "His eyes were in act even if mouth used to stop sometime". I never knew till now one can be so emotional for 100 odd days love, which is actually started with a prevarication and built upon the same. Let me not scrub the story as it is as big as one kollywood movie script. In simple sentence, Hero makes the friendship with heroine and heroine falls in love with hero.. and as usual her brother plays the villain role. The little change in climax is heroine listens to her
brother and ditches the hero for no reason and hero is in hospital with his beloved friends around and "THE END" appears.

Funny isn't it ?? U call me mad coz I said funny to this. What should I have said, a good tragic climax. I would have said if I was watching a movie. Certain things looks good only in the novels and movies. But in real life, if same happens to us or our beloved ones we realize the pain of tragic climax. Offcourse we are not actors and not enough lucky as soon as we finish the hospital scene and shoot for duet song next moment for second part of the movie with new heroine. Coming back to our hero .. when he was desolated by her for some moment he felt there is nothing in the world for him, and infact his emotions were killing him like a virus and he was
ready to give up this world .. FOR WHAT ?? guess its the same thing we asked. Tried consoling him did not work, we gave up this time. Tried to brainwash him but all in bootless ..He was not in a position to listen to any of our lecture ..But nothing was reaching his ear drum ...

Sun was making his appearance.. He went into sleep But we were discussing the action items for coming hours. The whole day we tried a lot to keep him diverted from those feelings......After doing all the tests in the hospital, we were out of that holly place at around 6 in the evening . .. when sun was disappearing. We took him to the park and tried convincing him and it was working ... He was thinking little practical and still we could see tears in his eyes. But we all decided to tell him one thing .. We did not him to forget her which we knew was little difficult for him at that time ..

We gave him choice to priorities between we guys(friends) , her and his parents and gave him two days hoping that we would not try to do anything crap. Finally after a week he came back to us saying friends first, parents next and if time permits gf ... We were very happy to listen to those words. Anyone might go into this tragical situation, wise decision would be to priorities the things and give importance to it. If a girl take you the extent to think about giving up everything for her, it is required to think thousand times " IS SHE WORTH IT ?? " It destines the destination.